Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Why I'm a Farmhand and not a Filmmaker...

My fellow farmhand MGX and I had a lively text conversation this afternoon, which degenerated into a brainstorm on farm-related book and movie titles... mostly horror. You may have to be a farmhand to get the true horror of these, but then again, you might not.

Farm horror stories:
The Garden of Shame (ok, this is an actual location on the farm, though it's no longer shameful)
The Land of the Foresaken Brassicas (MGX)
I Can't Get Up After Kneeling On The Cold Ground So Long (a drama)
Corpse of a Thousand Cabbages (MGX)
Revenge of the Runty Potatoes (MGX... might be a comedy)
The Fields Have Eyes! (MGX... recommends Rob Zombie for director)
The Clutching Fingers of Angry Zombie Housewives (MGX... Vincent Price as lead... nobody will get the Angry Housewife reference)
Compost Pile of the Dead
I Think the Ducks Are Stealing My Sanity...
Man With The Screaming Sorrel (this has to have Bruce Campbell in it!)
I Know You Dusted the Beets Last Summer
Cock (Rooster) of the Damned
Satan's Chicken Flock
The Birds (MGX... remake of the Hitchcock film with the Muppet chickens)
He Who Picks the Beans (MGX... based on a Stephen King novel)
The Chickweed Has Eyes (must have tentacles per MGX)
Can't Sleep, The Cows Will Eat Me

New additions (thanks MGX!):
The Turnips That Time Forgot
The Root Maggot That Ate New York

I hope these made you laugh. They made my day totally awesome!

I leave you with the Homicidal Squash, farm mascot and friend to all...

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