My fellow farmhand MGX and I had a lively text conversation this afternoon, which degenerated into a brainstorm on farm-related book and movie titles... mostly horror. You may have to be a farmhand to get the true horror of these, but then again, you might not.
Farm horror stories:
The Garden of Shame (ok, this is an actual location on the farm, though it's no longer shameful)
The Land of the Foresaken Brassicas (MGX)
I Can't Get Up After Kneeling On The Cold Ground So Long (a drama)
Corpse of a Thousand Cabbages (MGX)
Revenge of the Runty Potatoes (MGX... might be a comedy)
The Fields Have Eyes! (MGX... recommends Rob Zombie for director)
The Clutching Fingers of Angry Zombie Housewives (MGX... Vincent Price as lead... nobody will get the Angry Housewife reference)
Compost Pile of the Dead
I Think the Ducks Are Stealing My Sanity...
Man With The Screaming Sorrel (this has to have Bruce Campbell in it!)
I Know You Dusted the Beets Last Summer
Cock (Rooster) of the Damned
Satan's Chicken Flock
The Birds (MGX... remake of the Hitchcock film with the Muppet chickens)
He Who Picks the Beans (MGX... based on a Stephen King novel)
The Chickweed Has Eyes (must have tentacles per MGX)
Can't Sleep, The Cows Will Eat Me
New additions (thanks MGX!):
The Turnips That Time Forgot
The Root Maggot That Ate New York
I hope these made you laugh. They made my day totally awesome!
I leave you with the Homicidal Squash, farm mascot and friend to all...
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I promised a couple folks that I would share my obscure movie choices from the weekend, so here they are. I've been working my way through a short list of Tim Matheson's movies... I don't think I'm going to try and see everything the man has been in, because IMDB says he's been in everything (and I think it may hurt my hipster persona to actually see A Very Brady Sequel). Either way, I usually start working through an actor's catalog by viewing: 1) Films of theirs I have seen before but may have forgotten, then: 2) Horror or suspense films by said actor, then: 3) Comedies or other types of films that seem to fit my interests.
Up first: Deadly Game, which is listed as Catch Me If You Can (not to be confused by that mainstream film by that kid from the sinking ship movie which I shall not name as to not cause at least one online friend to go into severe fits) on IMDB.
Deadly Game IMDB here.
I had hoped this would be more action/suspense than comedy, but I was wrong. Forgiveable being that I think I paid $2 for the DVD online. My first reaction was that this film reminded me entirely too much of Home Alone, only with a slightly different storyline. It was fairly predictable, which I can react either way to, but it was funny. And heartwarming, though I hate to admit I like anything cutesy or heartwarming, I'd give this a 3 out of 5 star rating on the obscurefilm-o-meter.
Tim Matheson wakes up with pizza stuck to his face:
Considers the implications...
And eats it anyway:
The basic jist of the film is this: Down and out cop has to protect the world's most obnoxious kid from the mob and himself.
The kid in question is addressed simply as "kid" for most of the movie. Sometimes I wonder if "kid" is actually pure evil incarnate as he...
Handcuffs Tim Matheson to a table...
Locks him in a dumpster...
And basically runs amok.
Meanwhile "kid" is being searched for by the mob, intent on eliminating a murder witness.
I'll leave it at that. It's worth a watch if you like films like Home Alone or anything in the action comedy genre.
Next up: Bay Cove, released on television in 1987 as Bay Coven. I vaguely remembered this film from when it was shown originally. Being fairly poor, we didn't have a lot of money for video rentals, so I would tape stuff off the television. In fact, I would scour the TV Guide for listings of late-night horror movies to tape. I had an old Betamax VCR that had been handed down to me (at that time, a 13-year old kid), to keep in my room. So I taped obscure horror movies. This was one of them.
Basic premise, a young married couple move onto a small island and then all hell breaks loose. Woody Harrelson and Barbara Billingsley also have parts in this film, which I give a 4 out of 5 on the obscurefilm-o-meter.
Tim Matheson and his wife live in a city loft...
Woody Harrelson is their friend, who apparently lets himself in whenever he feels like...
They decide to move to an island...
They move in and weird shit happens...
Barbara Billingsley gets props for being perfectly creepy...
Gratuitous screencap of Tim Matheson in just a towel...
My only complaint about this film is that it is very hard to watch due to conversion issues. It's grainy and jumpy and somewhat headache-inducing. Made for tv movies from the 80's apparently don't transfer well to DVD and even on an upconverting 1080p DVD player, it kinda sucks. I wouldn't buy it for that reason... just Netflix it. The storyline is somewhat predictable as well, but I can't be a good judge of that being that I had seen this movie before, even though it didn't look familiar until about halfway through.
You can IMDB it here.
Next up: Sometimes They Come Back. Films made from Stephen King's works are not usually blockbusters, but they are usually tolerable.
